Going to Confession (the Sacrament of Reconciliation) can feel intimidating if you haven't been in a while or if it's your first time. This complete guide walks you through every step, from examination of conscience to absolution, so you know exactly what to say and do.
The Sacrament of Reconciliation is one of the Church's greatest gifts. Through it, we encounter God's mercy directly and receive forgiveness for sins committed after Baptism. It is not a burden: it is a liberation. Jesus gave the apostles the power to forgive sins when He said: "Receive the Holy Spirit. Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them" (John 20:22-23).
Before Confession, take time to reflect on your sins since your last Confession. An examination of conscience typically reviews the Ten Commandments and the Precepts of the Church. Ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten your memory and bring to mind anything that needs to be confessed.
You may sit face-to-face with the priest or kneel behind a screen: whichever makes you more comfortable. Begin with the Sign of the Cross and say: "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [time] since my last Confession."
Tell the priest your sins honestly and completely: type and number for mortal sins. For example: "I missed Mass three times without a good reason. I lied twice. I used impure language." Do not be afraid. The priest is bound by the seal of Confession and cannot reveal anything you confess, under any circumstances. This seal is absolute, even under threat of death.
The priest may offer advice or ask questions to help you grow in virtue. He will assign a penance: usually prayers (such as a decade of the Rosary or the Stations of the Cross) or an act of charity to repair the damage of sin.
Express sorrow for your sins. The traditional prayer: "O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended You, and I detest all my sins because of Your just punishments, but most of all because they offend You, my God, who are all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Your grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin."
The priest extends his hand and prays the prayer of absolution. As he says the final words: "I absolve you from your sins, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit", your sins are forgiven. Make the Sign of the Cross and respond: "Amen."
Leave the confessional and complete your penance as soon as possible. Give thanks to God for His mercy. If you forgot a sin during Confession, it is forgiven through the absolution, but mention it in your next Confession.
The Church recommends going to Confession at least once a year, but monthly or even weekly Confession is a common practice among devout Catholics. Many saints went weekly. The more often you go, the more sensitive you become to sin and the more you grow in grace.
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Start with the Sign of the Cross and say: ’Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [time] since my last Confession.’ Confess your sins honestly, type and number for mortal sins. The priest gives counsel and a penance. Pray the Act of Contrition. The priest gives absolution. Leave and complete your penance.
Begin: ’Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [weeks/months/years] since my last Confession.’ Then list your sins honestly. The priest may offer advice. Pray the Act of Contrition when asked. After absolution, respond ’Amen.’ Then fulfill your penance.
Confess all mortal sins (grave matter committed with full knowledge and deliberate consent) by type and number. Venial sins are also good to confess. Common sins include: missing Mass, lying, anger, gossip, impurity, pride, dishonesty, and neglecting prayer.
Yes, if you are conscious of mortal sin, you must go to Confession before receiving Holy Communion (CCC 1385). For venial sins, Confession is recommended but not required before Communion.
Yes. A priest can never reveal anything he hears in Confession, under any circumstances. The seal of confession is absolute and inviolable. Priests have gone to death rather than break it.
Watch a guided examination of conscience and receive spiritual direction before your next confession.
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